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Everyone is in shock about the mass killings at Planned Parenthood in Colorado Springs and now, at the campus for disabled adults in San Bernadino. But how can you be sure you don't raise a pyschopath ? A new study says that parents who don't pay enough attention to their children's distress may, in some very rare cases, not hear their children's cry for help, and then we all know what carnage can happen, after that. The recipe is pretty simple, at least to me. How do you stop a child, especially one who has experienced significant adversity, from growing up to be a psychopath? Responsive, empathetic care-giving – especially when children are in distress – helps prevent boys from becoming callous, unemotional adolescents, according to a new Tulane University study of children raised in foster care. The study showed that intervention can actually prevent such a disastrous outcome.  The destructive condition affects approximately 1 percent of the populatio...

I guess we shouldn't be surprised (horrified is more like it), but gun violence in movies has tripled since 1985, the year the rating was introduced. According to newswise.com, "The most popular PG-13 movies of 2011 and 2012 showed significantly more gun violence than R-rated movies of the same time period, a new study reveals." Could we be any more depressed?  I read yesterday that a gun rights advocate who wrote a (very mild) piece for Guns and Ammo about how maybe we should consider regulating guns just a little, was immediately fired from the magazine and vilified and threatened by his peers, while his editor wrote a meek apology for publishing the story, and was himself fired. Meanwhile, the killings in real life continue, with (you're not going to believe this) 16 mass killings since Newtown, where 20 first graders and six adults were gunned down last December.  (I so dread the anniversary coming up, especially because the vile NRA has promised to hold...

And where are we really?  Background checks didn't pass, the Democratic senators who voted against the proposed legislaton are still in Congress, and still against it, and the NRA is still whooping it up in victory. There have been a few signs of hope -- with NYC Mayor Bloomberg taking out ads against those running for office who are pro-gun, and his most controversial stand yet, urging big donors to deny funds to those four senators who joined the Republicans in killing the background check legislation, even if their seats may now fall to Republicans. You have to admire his drive -- though sitting on billions of dollars helps. And Democrats, according to The New York Times today, are also renewing their push for gun measures.  Jonathan Weisman writes that Senator Harry Reid of Nevada, though, is cautioning that he won't accept any bill that is weaker than the one voted on in April. But has anything really changed?  Hero teacher Victoria Soto's sisters were on mo...

I'm sure it doesn't come as a surprise to anyone but I was truly shocked when I read yesterday in The New York Times' that gun manufacturers feel no responsibility, just complete indifference  and resistance to the idea that any tracing of guns used by criminals -- or remorse -- might have prevented the recent killings at Newtown and other mass shootings. In fact, many of them were downright self-righteous, with the old "guns don't kill people, people kill people" mantra.  I'm not sure I'd be so holier-than-thou if I had the deaths of 20 elementary school students on my  watch. As Mike McIntyre and Michael Luo reported, the attitude of most sellers of guns is who, me?  "The president of Sturm, Ruger was not interested in knowing how often the police traced guns back to the company’s distributors, saying it 'wouldn’t show us anything," the writers related. And certainly a large swath of the public agrees.   Profit at the company s...

So now what?  Fuming last night, my husband said, "Everyone's so worried about gun control.  Then you have this.  What's the point of worrying about guns when a lunatic can do this." I've been thinking about it.  And, to me, it all comes back to the availability of materials that can kill. It's true, we're never going to be able to legislate mental illness, or those who want to kill.  And they will always be around. I suppose guns rights activists, dare I say it, are right.  If someone wants to massacre, they'll find a way to do it. But do we have to make it so easy for them?  This morning it was reported that even the slim background check legislation is in danger of failing, as more Republicans are now saying they will oppose it.  So really, how far have we come? I was naive thinking Newtown would change minds.  It's scary to me how very little the brutal killing of 20 innocent children has changed minds.  I truly believed, again...

So they're coming together.  The Democrats and Republicans have finally found an issue on which they can both agree when it comes to gun control.  Mental health. Whoopee. While there's no doubt that mentally ill people are the ones behind these horrendous mass killings, that still doesn't do anything about the fact that they can get their hands on weapons in the first place.  For all the celebrating (me, included) on just getting a gun control bill to the floor for debate, really, how far have we come to our goal? Saturday Night Live last night did a very funny (and, to me, heartbreaking) opener on just what's been agreed to so far, and for all the laughs and elbow nudging, the comics playing the two senators who triumped over recalcitrant GOP members to allow the bill to be debated, there was a sad, sad truth. As the comedians played to laughs that Domino's would no longer be able to give away free rifles with pizzas, or allow people to shoo...

It's astounding, and heartbreaking, but Newtown isn't going to change anything, after all. According to The Christian Science Monitor, public opinion polls have found that people favoring gun control has dropped by 10%.  Now, less than 50% of Americans believe our gun laws should be changed. Even stories about Newtown have dropped below the fold in many newspapers, and no longer lead the news at night or first thing in the morning.  Connecticut Gov. Dan Malloy lamented that we were losing the moment earlier this year, and looks like he was right. "As Congress prepares to vote on a comprehensive gun control bill next month, a poll released Tuesday shows that public support is waning for restrictions on gun ownership," The Monitor's Mark Guarino reported. But the most disturbing story of all appeared at breitbard.com, "Newtown Sides with NRA: Votes for Armed Guards in Schools." In this story it was noted that it's just a request, for now, and...

Now that more information about Adam Lanza and the Newtown massacre are about to hit the airwaves, how much do we really need to know? Make that, want to know. That he fired 155 bullets in less than five minutes, according to NBC News?  That he fired 154 of those bullets from his assault rifle and just one (to kill himself) from a handgun? And big surprise, that he had a certificate from, or was a member of, the National Rifle Association?  All these facts came out today at a press conference held by the chief prosecutor investigating the slaughter. So, does this make any of us feel better?  We sort of knew the main outline from all the newscasts.  This is just shedding a little more light (if there is any light to Adam Lanza).  We also learned just last week that he had a seven-foot spreadsheet of all the mass killings of recent years. But does this help us make any more sense of this horrific crime?  Not for me.  We always knew this kid w...

I admit, I was a little confused when people began sending money to Newtown, site of the 2012 horrific elementary school massacre.  What good does money do?  It can't bring the kids back. But then I started to read that it could pay for counseling and therapy and perhaps with burial expenses, so I thought, okay. Now people are arguing about it.  Guess you have to expect that, any time humans -- and cold, hard cash -- come together. Over $10 million was raised, and let's be honest, it felt to many like the one thing you could do to try somehow to compensate these parents for their unspeakable loss.  And most likely, it felt good. But now different groups are fighting over just how the money should be distributed, according to Peter Applebome in today's NYT.  Taking a lot of the heat is the United Way, because quite a bit of the money went to that organization, Applebome writes, and survivors told him they've seen very little or none of it and are concerne...

So it looks like that's all we're going to get.  After all the blood that was spilled in Newtown, and Aurora and  the 14 other mass killings last year, we're just getting background checks. Which, the Republicans, bless their hearts, want to emasculate even further by requiring that no records be kept of the checks. After all the tragedy and grief and promises to make it stop, we're getting background checks.  That's it. Some say background checks are a huge step in the right direction. But why do I feel so defeated? And it's not even 100% sure that Congress, when it returns from recess, will even vote in that. I think back to December 14 often and how I was driving to an after-school homework club for elementary school students when I heard some local radio jocks talking in muted voices about a shooting. It took a second before I realized, hey. They're talking about a real shooting.  And can it be, kids died? I continued driving and the facts b...

Would I have the strength?  Or the desire to do it?  I don't know.  But Alyssa and Robbie Parker did, meeting with Adam Lanza's father barely a month after his son murdered their daughter Emilie at Sandy Hook Elementary. They recently spoke to Norah O'Donnell on CBS This Morning about their January 23rd meeting, and they talked about how they hoped it would bring them closure for them as well as for Peter Lanza. Not much has been released about what was actually discussed but when O'Donnell asked if it had been emotional, it was the one time Robbie Parker's voice wavered. Do they hold Peter Lanza accountable, the Parkers were asked, and Alyssa said it wasn't his decision to make, so how could they? Was his parenting to blame?  Here they were a little more definitive, agreeing that yes, it was possible. But I've wrestled with that. If my son, who is 11, did something this heinous, or even something not so, would I feel responsible?  The answer is yes....

NY Gov. Andrew Cuomo is backing down, too.  In the face of the assault weapon ban dying in Congress, "Cuomo Favors Easing Part of Newly Passed Gun Law," according to Thomas Kaplan and Danny Hakim of The New York Times. What's he's easing, they report, is the restriction on the legal capacity of magazine rounds, down from seven, as in the newly-passed law, to nothing. The gun-control law, approved in January, banned the sale of magazines that hold more than seven rounds of ammunition. But, guess what?  Seven-round magazines are not routinely manufactured. And, oh, those poor legal gun owners.  "Although the new gun law provided an exemption for the use of 10-round magazines at firing ranges and competitions, it did not provide a legal way for gun owners to purchase such magazines," Kaplan and Hakim write. So here's the "compromise" -- you can still buy magazines that hold 10 rounds. But you can only use seven.  Now who's going t...

Well, the naysayers were right.  As Newtown slowly sinks into the background, all our courageous senators and representatives are sliding down with it. Just heard today that the assault rifle ban has once again been lifted from the gun control plan that will go to the Senate today for approval. Should we be surprised?  I guess not.  Outraged?  Yes. Despite all the tragedy and hand-wringing over the Newtown massacre of 20 small children, and the brave agreement among sensible gun owners that something must be done, we're once again back in the embrace -- and fear -- of the NRA. Guess we can't blame it all on the Colts and Sturm Rugers, er, I mean the NRA. Thankfully, there are four states that have moved to more restrictive gun laws; New York, Hawaii, California and surprisingly, to me, Illinois.  And hopefully, Connecticut will join their ranks soon, though Gov. Malloy wants to allow those who own assault rifles to keep them, although the Democrats in th...

I was astounded to read over the weekend that Connecticut Gov. Dan Malloy -- remember Newtown? -- feels all gun owners, including the mentally ill who could harm others or themselves, should be allowed to keep all their guns, including assault rifles and those which carry magazines with more than 10 bullets. What?!  The New York Times also reported today that even in states where women know their exes have guns and will come after them still do not confiscate the guns. I realize this is what the pro-gun lobby is so terrified about.  Relinquishing their rifles.  But do they truly want to be in the next theater that's sprayed with bullets as they watch the latest Disney release? (A quick side note -- three of five homicides in the U.S. are people committing suicide.  Sadly, the mentally ill often figure here.)   I believe in personal freedom.  That women should have the right to their bodies, and abortion.  That people be allowed to drink Big Gulps...

T he New York Times reports today on a unique program going on in Los Angeles that identifies kids who fool around with guns and shrapnel and/or have said they want to shoot up a school.  According to Erica Goode, the program hopes to find these ticking time bombs before they detonate. They even have nicknames for the kids, calling one "Jared Loughner," after the man who mowed down people in the Colorado theater last year, who was obsessed with guns and killing, staying in touch with his mother to make sure the teen was stable and not showing any signs of committing violence, Goode writes. Logically enough, many of these kids show the instability or rage or depression that Adam Lanza, the Newtown serial killer who obliterated two first grade classes; Loughner, and others before they commit a crime. The Los Angeles School Threat Assessment Response Team is one of the most intensive efforts in the country working on picking out those who are drawn to violence, and trying...

In a staggering (to me, at least) front-page story in the New York Times today, the presence of guns in homes in this country has declined precipitously. The rate of those who keep guns in their homes is now at 34%, down from 50% in the '70s, the article notes -- in complete contradiction to reports of guns flying off shelves in the wake of the killings of 20 children in Newtown last year, dozens at a movie theater in Aurora, CO, and last month's shooting spree by a former cop in California. So why do I not feel better? Maybe because women are now jumping into the game, too. According to Billy Hallowell, "In a survey last year by the National Shooting Sports Foundation , 73 percent of gun dealers said the number of female customers had gone up in 2011, as had a majority of retailers surveyed in the two previous years," rising from 13% in 2005 to 23% in 2011, as reported in a Gallup poll. KGET.com adds that gun makers are taking notice, "creating everything ...

My son didn’t turn in his math homework. A straight-A student, he brought his grade down to an F.  This has happened before. The weird thing is, he does it.  He just doesn’t turn it in.  I’ve heard it’s a middle school thing.  The excuses range from “I left it in my locker” to “It wasn’t in my folder” to “I couldn’t find it in my desk.” Huh?  True, it’s not like he committed mass murder, but still.  It makes me wonder how well I know my son. And it made me think about that woman who wrote, “I am Adam Lanza’s Mother,” after Newtown .  She was on a PBS special this week and she talked about how she carries a Tupperware container full of knives, hammers, and other sharp kitchen tools in her car in case her son attacks her again with a knife.  He was 10 at the time. She said they live on eggshells, terrified of the next violent eruption.  The child himself said he hates it, but can’t control himself. Probably a lot like ...

Interesting article in The Advocate (Stamford, CT) yesterday.  Apparently, although the use of violent video games has exploded, crime itself has decreased, according to several sources. But they will most likely never be banned because they are protected under their makers' rights to free speech. Sadly, no link has yet been found between violence and viewing video games, The Advocate reported, quoting  David J. McGuire , staff attorney for the American Civil Liberties Union of Connecticut , who told the Connecticut legislature's Children's Committee, that the Supreme Court has "concluded there is little evidence of a link between violent video games and violent behavior in children, and ruled that such a tenuous correlation was not sufficient to impose a restriction on this protected medium." Seems kind of strange to me.  What a wild, wild west this country has become.  The Constitution guarantees the right to own guns . . .and the right for video game...

If you were in Times Square yesterday, about 1 p.m., you would have seen about 200 people fling themselves on the ground, then watch others draw chalk outlines of their bodies, then add names and ages, all to honor the victims of Newtown. It's not much, and it won't bring back those 20 innocent souls, but at least, for a moment, we were remembering, and memorializing, those beautiful children.  We weren't forgetting. Because we could be losing “our moment in time to get this thing done," as Governor Malloy was quoted in The New York Times, as states -- even Connecticut -- drag ther feet on gun control. http://www.nytimes.com/2013/02/25/nyregion/flash-mob-in-times-square-performs-dance-in-honor-of-newtown-victims.html?_r=0 http://www.nytimes.com/2013/02/25/opinion/common-sense-in-connecticut.html?_r=0  

I guess we should be grateful.  The Washington Post reports that, after Newton, support for spending on mental health has soared. Brady Dennis and Lena H. Sun write that mental health professionals are jumping up and down and clicking their heels in delight that finally, finally, the spotlight is shining on the need to end budgeting slashes and plug the gaps in the mental care network. "A year that could have brought another round of thinning resources and a spot far down the priority list of policymakers is shaping up quite differently in some statehouses," they note.  Some states, like Minnesota -- long a free-thinking place with a conscience (I lived there briefly) -- is hoping to institute mental programs and resources in schools.  "Wisconsin’s famously budget-conscious governor, Republican Scott Walker , this month proposed a nearly $30 million boost to mental-health spending in his budget, including funding for a program that allows counties to pr...