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Facebook.  Love it or hate it, we all usually sign on at least occasionally. But now a new study says that it can find you a job -- depending on who's your friend.   And where you live. But whether you should concentrate your networking on your numerous “weak ties,” which is how most jobs are found, or a single “strong tie” who will champion your cause depends in part on the country in which you live, according to newswise.com. Research from Tufts University found that the role of weak and strong ties in job searches is important around the world, but the value of a single strong tie is even more important for job seekers in countries with pronounced income inequality, such as South Africa, Nicaragua, and Haiti. Conversely, it turns out that a single strong tie is not as important for job seekers in countries with greater socio-economic equality, such as Sweden, Slovenia, and the Netherlands. “In many ways, the results tell us the best way to use your ne...

So you think you're drawn to liberal, social-cause-minded politicians because you love Hillary?  Nah.  It was in you all along. According to a new study, our desire for like-minded others is actually hard-wired in us and it controls our choices in friends and partners.  (Though maybe not in my house.  My husband has become a Fox News-lover and somehow, we're still married.) But, in what might be considered a paradigm shift, the study’s most surprising finding may be that people in relationships do not change each other over time. Instead, researchers' evidence places new emphasis on the earliest moments of a relationship—revealing that future friends or partners are already similar at the outset of their social connection, a major new finding, say the authors. "Picture two strangers striking up a conversation on a plane, or a couple on a blind date,” says Assistant Professor of Psychology Angela Bahns (Wellesley College).  “From the very first mome...

Face threats  Do you know what that is?  I'd never heard the term before and it confused me a little.  Until I realized it meant what people think about you on social media. There's another phrase, too.  Impression management.  That's a little easier to understand.  Impression management refers to an individual's deliberate efforts to control or influence other people's perceptions. Sometimes impression management occurs in reaction to face threats: unfavorable incidents that undercut a person's ability to cultivate and maintain a desirable self-image on social networking sites (SNSs). You know?  Like bragging about your new boyfriend who's a doctor and your friend posts that he's really a dentist.  That happened to me.   SNSs such as Facebook, where content can be shared widely and is often persistent, studies have repeatedly shown that people are vulnerable to face threats resulting from things that others post, according ...

My husband watches Fox News.  He loves Bill O'Reilly.  Mike Huckabee, too.  He's against allowing immigrants to remain in this country.  And he's not too crazy about the Affordable Care Act, or President Obama. We don't see eye-to-eye on anything. So how are we still together?  I like him. I wouldn't have said that  half our relationship ago.  In the beginning, there were many years when it was a competition.   Who could win first? But then, life intervened.  We had a child, I got cancer, our mothers both developed serious illnesses and died.  And suddenly winning didn't seem the point anymore. Of course, everything isn't perfect.  He still makes me furious, pretending he doesn't hear me when I ask him to take out the garbage or vacuum the family room floor.  He still comes home and drops his coat on the floor (as does our son now, too). And his idea of a birthday gift (even a big one) is well, a card, if I'...

So now I get it.  It's that electric jolt I get when my views top 75 (OK, only once, but come on, people, tell your friends about this blog!).  Facebook is our high. An op-ed in The Sunday Review put it the best:  we love the instant approval we get when we post something and our friends immediately respond.   The essay was mostly about the bad things Facebook encourages us to do, like pose in a thong, when  mommy panties make more sense, or post how much you hate your boss, or, to me, the worst, deface places like the Grand Canyon or saguaros in the desert just so you can post it online.  But as Jenna Wortham puts it, "That feedback loop of positive reinforcement is the most addictive element of social media." Whether you're a mom posting your son's championship baseball win, or your latest cedar-planked salmon, let's face it.  It feels good when friends come back with praise and accolades. “For people who get a lot of motivation out of knowi...